The film screening is “Breathe,” they told me. It got César Award nominations, they told me. And Mélanie Laurent’s the big name, they told me. Who? What?
To be nice — a rare moment — I went. I asked Mélanie about her role. “I’m not in it.”
Who wrote the dialogue? “It’s all in French.”
Where’d it film? “France.” Why? “They wanted that.”
Who’s the producer? “He’s French.”
Name the cast. “Joséphine Japy and Lou de Laâge.”
Having schlepped way downtown, this interview was going great. I then found she’s the co-writer and director, is beautiful, sweet, fun and superfamous in France.
“I spoke no English until doing the movie ‘Inglourious Basterds.’ I didn’t go to language school. I learned fast because to understand everything, I had to. In France we only speak French.
Same here. Americans only speak English.”
Sipping Champagne, smoothing her sparkly Dior, Mélanie showed me a photo. “Léo. My 3-month-old lovely little son. He’s in Paris with his dad. We’re kind of married, but no wedding yet. I’m only here four days, then right home. I love being here — and US food. I’m a vegetarian. Big breakfast. Omelet, potatoes, toast. But I miss my country.”
She said: “I began this project when I read its book at 17. Too young to do anything about it then, but the story of how in a moment two women’s lives can change, I never forgot.
“But directing made for nerves for me. I observed. Learned to adjust. My first reaction at the end was, ‘You can’t show this movie. It’s not good.’ I was full of doubts. But they didn’t change anything.”
Then, still holding the Champagne glass, Laurent kept walking. She never spilled a drop.
Beware the airplane tray table
After microbiologists sampled five airports, four flights, two airlines, revealed is regularly cleaned aircraft johns are not the least tidy spot.
Tray tables, cleaned not between flights but mostly at day’s end, carry eight times more bacteria. Hand sanitizer is advised to eliminate direct contact. Other no-no spots: seat-belt buckles, overhead vents and the absolute least sanitary place? Drinking fountain buttons.
Tests were done by the National Science Foundation.
Odds & Ends
Rihanna at Mamo in Soho . . . Per my Hungarian contingent, two ISIS members were collared in Budapest . . . With music biz dropping from $38 billion in ’99 to $15 billion in 2014, Dr. Dre says: “Exciting stuff’s not happening these days. Artists aren’t even motivated to go into a studio anymore” . . . “Empire’s” Taraji P. Henson: “With my first money, I bought a Yukon SUV. Driving to my first job, it broke down.”
Context gone
From Louis René Beres, Purdue’s Professor Emeritus of Political Science:
“Earliest days of our republic, presidents had familiarity with Locke, Vattel, Hobbes, Grotius, Rousseau, Montesquieu.” None of today’s candidates “can identify one of those philosophic founders of American political thought.” The Princeton- educated Ph.D. concluded his concept of modern political oratory with: “Today it’s ‘Just shut up and sit down.’ ”
Please try to pay attention
DiCaprio: “I don’t know about online stuff. Others do, not me. I just like to go online to see what people are saying about me” . . . Emilio Estevez says if making movies doesn’t pan out great, he’d like eventually to be a journalist . . . Brad Pitt: “I love traffic. It gets out your aggressions. Yell at someone, or let someone cut in lane and feel like a nice guy.”
At Le Cirque: Question: “How can Jeb Bush’s campaign heat up a little?” Answer: “Maybe put a hibachi in his shorts.”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.